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"You may have to fight a battle more than once
to win it..." Margaret Thatcher
I am certainly proving this statement is true! And I am grateful for the comfort it brings!
You cant fight destiny or fate... there millions of movies written about this very thing, trying to prove or disprove the theory...but essentially...in the end, fate has its wicked way with you and you wind up where you were supposed to be anyway...it is true that everything happens for a reason...and you can't muck with destiny...it is what it is...
Here's a little list of movies I'm talking about...
The Butterfly Effect
The Time Traveler's Wife
And you can find more in the Top Ten List here
Coz...we all do that thing...that thing where we go "I wish I could go back in time and ..." Whateverrrr... imagine...just imagine for one second you could go back and rearrange history... You could even unmake someone or unwish them...or just UNDO decisions and situations...imagine a 'delete or undo button' on life...how would that turn out...I am pretty sure that app would have people diving to delete and undo before you could say 'how do I download that magic button!'...but with what kind of devastating consequences ...there's a reason we can't go back...
'May the bridges I burn light the way!...'
The only thing I do wish we could do is bring back the loved ones we've lost to the grave!
I am a firm believer that each situation in life is a stepping stone that ultimately leads you to where you belong. It takes you to the people you need to meet, the places you need to see and embroils you in certain stories for the lessons you need, to go onto your next place in the world...alter those decisions and you alter the equilibrium of everything!!! Everything in the universe is tied in and interconnected...no really!
"Be careful what you wish for...you might get it!"
You've heard of being in the right place at the right time? I passionately believe this... because it has happened to me many times and certainly in the past few months... if you can make it to the end of this post, there's a special announcement at the end to this effect...
Last year I lost everything...my home, material possessions and more...some things I chose to lose and I offloaded a lot of my possessions because I just didn't want the memories. However, some had precious memories attached - like the bassinette my grandfather made well over 65 years ago and I refuse to part with it. But there were some other things I was attached to just simply because they were very me and they were 'mine'...but, I sold them anyway. I wanted to prove to myself I could live 'without' within! That despite having next to nothing (save some boxes of photos and a few ornaments, clothes, and other odds and ends) that I could exist happily in the world...without the proverbial noose of 'far too many things' (or dust collectors) around my neck...I wanted to prove that I am more than the sum of what I own! And to be honest, I feel better without it all, lighter...less weighed down...I even ditched books I had LOVED!!! ...now, they are for someone else to love. It's kind of like paying it forward I guess. I don't regret it. It's a good feeling...I love the simplicity and I love knowing that someone else's life is blessed from what I gave away!
"To those whom much is given, much is expected"
"I learned to give, not because I have much, but because I know how it feels to have nothing!"
Two of my favorite quotes.
In all of this, the human element never escaped my attention...and I became more in touch with who I am, and those around me - my nearest and dearest. I became minimalist. And I prefer a simple life...now my main focus revolves around - (not necessarily in this order)
1. My people
3. Food ... learning a new way of life (to prepare, to cook, to eat) thanks to my brother
My desires are few...eat, sleep, travel and blog! *My Bliss!*
I could sleep on a mattress on the floor so long as I have the people beside me that I love most in the world...I don't need life on a grand scale. If you have your health you have everything!! If you have the people you love, need and want in your life, you are blessed beyond measure...and if you can live your passion - whatever that may be...then you are truly at the top of the rich list!
Now all I long for is a palm tree, and a good book, or my tablet or laptop that I can create on...to watch my children at play...and I am a happy girl! It is ENOUGH!
These past months have been heaven and hell! But, fate...destiny...life...the Universe... GOD...keeps handing me the people I need to survive it and navigate it...for which I am eternally grateful! And I have learned to be grateful...for simply everything...even for simplicity and what it has brought me and taught me. In the midst of simplicity stood and evolved my greatest lessons and blessings!
For all that life has taken away, it has given me back tenfold in other ways...for how do I put a price on having my father and brother back in my life? How do I quantify the beautiful journey I have experienced in New York? How do I expand on how I feel about the gentle and genuine friendships I have made...including my relationship with a beautiful man? Yes, you read that right...I did say a few days ago that I had a little announcement to make...I've been separated almost 19 months now...but I have discovered... "If you're brave enough to say goodbye, life rewards you with a new hello." - Paulo Coehlo
Thank you to those who truly love me for who I am...flaws and all...no matter what! Coz I'm never changing who I am!
But first, before I get into that...let me recap on what life has been like this week!
We lost a friend...death snuck into our lives and stole away a beautiful soul; he was buried two days ago...I can barely believe it. His pic is in the above collage. I have already blogged about him here and here, and also here, in varying stages and degrees.
I hit the Vineyards with gusto and enjoyed a weekend with my best friend creating memories...that's what life is all about! Great memories...and great photo moments!
We hit the beach (one of my fave places to be!)
Putting their best foot forwward!
Facing different ways but they even walk the same!
...and my daughter and I had our Helix pierced together...OUUUUUUUUUUCH! I grimaced and had to breathe through the pain...she didn't bat an eyelid...and I thought I'd be soooo brave...this minor thing ten kids later! lol My pics are in the collage above...here's hers. Last week she had her nose pierced! (same as me)...though I've had mine done 7 years now, and let me tell you, if it closes over, I am NOT having it redone...on a pain scale of 1-10 that was like a 23! ha ha! Screw that, I'd rather go through labor again lol!
You can just see my tiny butterfly here!
A momento of the babies I have lost.
My friend's son celebrated his tenth birthday here...HAPPY BIRTHDAY 'X'. Last year my little brother made his cake! Wow! What a difference a year makes eh...
and I came across this car (below) in a car park!
'YOUR LOSS!!!' bahahhaaa!
Guess that was a break-up/divorce car!
You go cupcake! I love it!
You go cupcake! I love it!
I need to get myself one of THOSE I think ;)
and speaking of numbers and letters...
here's an 'S' for 'my Superman'
It's been a huge and harrowing week and I am beyond emotionally exhausted. It's an early night for me...and tomorrow, it's a case of help a friend move annnnd...an Engagement Party to attend ;)
Take care all, til next time...